Note: Post written on 19 April 2010
Then He brought him [Abraham] outside and said, "Look now toward heaven, and count the stars if you are able to number them." And He said to him "So shall your descendant be." And he believed in the Lord, and He accounted him it to him for righteousness.
Genesis 15: 5-6
Before coming back to Cambodia, I've been seeking God for what He wants me to do when I'm back here, and I felt He was saying that I am to prepare myself for the new centre. I thought that was strange. Part of me was excited and part of me was afraid because at that time I've only heard about the place and was clueless of what is really ahead. So I asked, "Are you sure Lord?", and there was only silence.
When we took the right turn into the dirt road that leads to the centre, the first thought that came to mind was that this road is going be a great challenge during rainy season. What if the road gets too muddy? Gets flooded? Besides that, there were also other concerns that came to mind. Those thoughts are overwhelming. But on the other hand, I know that there will be a lot to do for the children. So how should I go about with this?
During one of the days, as I was painting at the boy's dorm God suddenly broke the silence and we had an interesting conversation.
God : What are you doing?
Me : Painting. This is a weird question God.
God : What are u painting?
Me : Err…stars. Many stars with some red dots around.
God : Right, you are painting stars.
Do you remember that I said something about stars in my word?
Me : Yeah, your covenant with Abraham.
*A few minutes of silence*
Me : So? What is it that You are trying to say?
God : These children are the sons of Abraham.
They are the testimony of my promise to my friend, Abraham.
Me : …
I was speechless (for a long time). This makes me realize who am I to place my personal concern above the children. It was a humbling moment. Besides, it also reminded me that coming to Cambodia is not about teaching English, but rather it is to make the children (or whoever) disciples of Jesus Christ. Those "concerns" I have are still there, but what He said meant much more than my "concerns", and so as the Holy Spirit enables me, I say "Yes" to God that I'll stay at Poipet.